Just around the Xmas season, many people travel thousands of miles to be with families and friends, or to be with others who are trying to avoid the dreaded time of loneliness. If I remember correctly there is an old song which goes like this…’ Saturday night is the loneliest night of the week.’ Why Saturday night, I ask? Because people chose to go out on a Saturday night for several reasons, one of which is that others are also available to go out. Unfortunately, someone for several reasons may not have anyone to share his/her company and thus will be lonesome. That lonely feeling is not a pleasant one, and those who are gone out with friends and relatives cannot be blamed. So, who must be blamed for one’s loneliness?
Loneliness is not pleasant, if it were, it would not be feared and avoided, at times at a very high price. Let us face it, loneliness is a prevalent global problem which is linked to many chronic conditions. It is linked to heart disease, lung disease, hypotension, stroke and metabolic disorders such as obesity. It is also a major predictor of psychological problems such as depression, stress and anxiety. Loneliness also is linked to overall morbidity and mortality particularly with adult populations. Please do not be misled children’s behavior to other children using the weapon of isolation often leads to loneliness and possible suicide.
LONELINESS IS A MULTIDIMENSIONAL CONSTRUCT
Canada’s population is getting older and older. People are living longer and therefore there is also an increase in the number of people living alone, and of course a greater risk of isolation. Before I go any further, let me say that loneliness and isolation are two different kinds of constructs. A person can be alone and not feeling lonesome, as well as being with others but still lonesome. One writer said that loneliness is natural, that is it may become active at certain moments in time in life and affect anyone regardless of gender, age, or other sociomoral psychological characteristics. One writer even went on to explain that loneliness is rooted in the weakness and self-pity of the individual who is unable to take care of it, to eliminate it since it is not a physical ailment. Loneliness also seems to occur when there is a deficit between actual social relationship and expected social relationship. The number of social relationships and the depth of the social relationships are all important.
The Xmas season is traditionally the time that most people celebrate together. The urge to celebrate is very strong, the push to be with others is also very strong.
Social isolation is on the rise among older people. It is an objective and quantifiable reflection of the reduction in the size of the social network and the lack of social contacts. Often, this isolation is associated with an increased risk of developing infectious diseases, cognitive impairment and mortality and the onset of frailty. Health decline is noticeable and there is a greater age-related deterioration in cognitive ability and the risk of dementia. It is becoming more and more critical that a systematic and concrete preparation be made to counter loneliness and isolation. Old age is an important milestone deserving of equal attention. Since loneliness and isolation are two problems of old age, plans to address this should start long before one gets old.
SOME COPING MECHANISMS
How much contact one continues to maintain as they grow older? Try to keep these, you make the calls. Do not be ashamed of being old, do not apologize for it. It is alright to be forgetful, it is alright to be slower, it is alright not to be strong as you had been. Include younger people in your contacts, volunteer, join a church and become active, act your age and be proud doing so. BE STRONG.
Once again, my best wishes to the management and staff of the Montreal Contact, its readers and supporters. Thanks for the feed-back I receive from time to time. Please continue to support the Contact, Egbert wants you to do so.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO ALL.
